The best movie poster I have ever seen could be for Craig Brewer’s new film “Black Snake Moan,” or as I call it- “White Trash On A Chain.” You know people are just lovin’ it. When I went to the theatre recently I noticed that the poster displayed above that I had initially seen depicting Samuel L. Jackson standing above a chained Christina Ricci was now simply Sam standing with a chain. Who wants to bet a bunch of old white people lost their fucking minds and decided to complain? What I would do to have a Polaroid or recording of the film execs’ reaction when they saw what Brewer proposed.
Perhaps the conversation went like this-
Brewer- So there is the poster. I am really proud of it, it has that comic book vibe.
Rich White Film Guy- Ummmm, ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. How can I say this?
Brewer- Say what?
RWFG- Well, the thing is that you have Samuel L. Jackson standing above Christina Ricci in chains. And she doesn’t look that upset about being chained up. People could get the wrong idea…
Brewer- You do know that the movie does involve him chaining her up, right? He attempts to cure her of her wickedness. You have seen the trailer?
RWFG- No, I never read the script or saw the trailer. Heard the name Samuel L. Jackson, and remembered classics like The Negotiator and Deep Blue Sea. You know the one where is yelling and then gets eaten? Classic. The stuff you did with the Terrance Howard was great. He pimped that white girl, but didn’t chain her up. Couldn’t you just have Sam standing next to her? How about we just have her on her own in chains?
RWFG- Better yet, why don’t you put Justin Timberlake on the poster? Maybe in a pose like he is going to sing, a profile or something. It’s only 2007 and I don’t think that people are ready to see Sam chaining up Christina Ricci when they take the kids to see Harry Potter.
Despite Peter Traver’s bitchass hating on the film- “Offensive on multiple levels — if only the plot had any levels at all — Black Snake Moan leaves no Tobacco Road cliche unsmoked,” I have already set aside twenty dollars so I can enjoy a cherry Icee and popcorn as I watch Sam try to cure the white trash of her wickedness. I think that “offensive on multiple levels” is whitespeak for “I don’t like to see a black man having any sort of control over a white woman, even if her character in the film is severely fucked up.” I hope that Sam castrates Justin Timberlake in the film.
Below are the other two versions of the poster: